


If Things Run Differently

by lunaryu (zeroshikidarkangel)



Category: Kekkaishi
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drama, Fluff, Friendship, Gen lives, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Male Slash, Romance, What-If, a lil bit angst, strictly anime oriented
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2014-10-01
Packaged: 2018-02-11 22:36:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2085750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zeroshikidarkangel/pseuds/lunaryu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Having one-sided love isn’t nice at all, especially if his crush is an obnoxious, dimwitted, thickheaded, moronic straight boy who already has mind on another girl. Still, for the sake of his smile only, Gen can endure being by his side. No, he needs to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Smile

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer: Kekkaishi © Tanabe Yellow.** Luna only borrows the character to play with  
>  Warning: _Semi AU, possible oOC-ness (I hope not really), shounen ai and fluff_
> 
> I am getting frustrated because there's not enough fanfic for Kekkaishi, especially Gen/Yoshi pairing. I mean…come on! They're HOT together! Why won’t everyone want to ship them!? I want to read so badly, but there's just not enough! DX That's why; I decide to make one myself. I hope this will turn alright ^_^

**If Things Run Differently**

**© lunaryu~**

**_Smile_ **

* * *

Gen doesn’t remember when it started. Things has been spiraling out of his control lately.

Is he in hormone turmoil? He isn’t particularly sure of that. Well, yeah, he is fourteen, a full-fledged teenager and all, but _that_ only applies if he’s a normal boy. Does it happen to _a_ _yakashi_ _m_ _ajiri_ as well? Or if his animal slash _ayakashi_ instinctis is more dominant, should it be called 'in heat' instead of in hormone turmoil?

Maybe it’s a moment of confusion… _Ugh_ , no; Gen refuses to call it as a moment of _insanity_ no matter how other people see it. That will be absurd because Gen is positive that he isn’t crazy. _Angry and resentful, maybe; crazy?—_ he scoffs. He is painfully aware that he’s emotionally stunted, _thank you very much._ Still doesn’t mean it makes him crazy.

_Right… that isn’t helping in the slightest_ —Gen sighs slightly as he sits up and scratches the back of his neck, somehow feeling a strange ache inside his chest that he doesn’t really understand.

Today is a fine,bright, normal day and as usual, Gen is on the rooftop, trying to spend his free time napping. Well, if he could actually sleep, it would be called napping, but because he fails to do so, his mind keeps wandering in an uncharted territory that he doesn’t even know exists in his head.

Moreover, the most annoying thing is…the source of his _frustration_ is there as well, sleeping peacefully inside a _kekkai_ , blissfully unaware of the bizarre things boiling inside Gen's head while the spiky haired, scary-eyed boy is grudgingly _forced_ to listen to the other boy's faint sound of breathing which repeatedly escaped through between his pink lips in steady shush.

If it was _allowed_ , Gen would strangle the boy to death in order to stop that _tickling_ sound. It’s driving him nuts.

He can't help sighing again in exasperation. How come Gen finds the other boy's company bothering him? Since when and how? Gen really should stop thinking or his mind will explode, because no matter how hard he chews over it, he still doesn’t get the answer.

It’s just…sort of happening before Gen even notices it. When he tries to trace back his memory, it may have…uh, _probably_ , started after _that_ _day_ , when Atora gave them a challenge to test their ability to work as a team.

That day, after Gen, Yoshimori and Yukimura won the challenge, the thing said by Sumimura Yoshimori while strongly holding his hand…

_"I won't let go of your hand."_

It is a serious statement. There is no doubt in his voice and eyes such that it surprises Gen very much. _T_ _hat time_ , Gen couldn't name his feeling with anything else but happiness.

Frankly, lately Gen has felt a strange bond forming between him, Yoshimori and that Yukimura girl. It’s admittedly close to friendship that he couldn't believe it _at first_. Still, after that incident with Kaguro, Gen losing his control of his power and the possibility of his withdrawal from Karasumori back to Urakai, Gen finds it really hard to part with them.

It’s possibly because that day Yoshimori visited his house, bringing him some sweets he had made himself with effort just for him. Alright, Yoshimori did tell him it was an experiment, but the fact that he tried to get a reaction from Gen afterwards rather intrigued him.

Gen doesn’t eat sweets; he kind of hates them, period.

But then, when Yoshimori was looking at him with those wide innocent, expectant eyes, Gen couldn't help feeling guilty if he wasted his effort. So, after Gen test-tasted the chocolate cake, he just commented _"It's not bad,"_ and he briefly thought that his answer was unsatisfactory for Yoshimori's curiosity. However then, a wide, happy smile slowly bloomed on Yoshimori’s face. It was so radiant that it almost threw Gen overboard getting a sudden assault from such amazing expression.

Gen couldn’t help widening his eyes, before he felt the need to avert his gaze, focusing on anywhere else but Yoshimori to keep his own expression in check.

Honestly, Gen doesn’t think his general comment will get such a reaction from the other boy. His smile at that time was genuine satisfaction, but right until this moment Gen still can’t comprehend what had made Yoshimori so happy. Was his commentary really that great? Gen is pretty sure that he said it with flat tone, though.

Then, Atora just had to barge in and told Yoshimori that Gen hated sweets. He looked really guilty and crestfallen afterwards for forcing Gen to eat the cake. Gen had coolly convinced him that his chocolate cake was fine even though he didn't like sweets, but then Yoshimori just smiled _again_ and promised to make another sweet which was less sweet for him.

Gen can't help thinking that Yoshimori is trying hard to know him more…as a friend. It’s really…strange in Gen's opinion, but he doesn’t dislike the sentiment. If he thinks it hard enough, he can almost feel _pleasant_.

And then…and then…things just become weirder and weirder after that. Of course the three of them, Yoshimori, Yukimura girl and he, still do their job protecting Karasumori from ayakashi and Kokuborou. It’s not easy, but they manage to do it with their combination attacks. Unfortunately (or fortunately, _actually_ , for Gen at least), the thing that turns weird doesn't appear visibly like a cat starting having period or something like that, more like…Gen's mind is the one which gradually goes odd.

He starts to notice small things about Yoshimori that he usually ignores. Things like how good he looks when he is fighting under the moonlight or how pale his skin is compared to his own. Things like how he will blush while scrunching his nose and furrowing his brows when he is praised so suddenly and how soft his gaze is whenever he is serenely watching over the night view of Karasumori land from his _kekkai_ up in free air.

Then Gen starts wondering how the boy will look if he is in _that_ _kind_ of situation. Ahem, if you’re marveling about what kind of situation running inside Gen's head, you need to be at least 18 year old to take a peek.

Gen doesn’t know why he’s suddenly so curious about it. Heck, he has never even thought about _that_ even though he has the hottest girl offer him her body before, so why the heck will he start to get interested now, especially when the object of his interest is a boy in his age, who happens to be his _friend_ and teammate and is obviously as straight as an arrow.

Gen barely considers him a friend before, so why does it suddenly leap into something else as significantly as it is now? Could it be? He even almost believes in an idea that he may have been _possessed_ whenever his mind starts picking up Yoshimori's images getting involved in many-many inappropriate state of affairs.

Worse, without knowing the direction of Gen's mind when he is thinking, Yoshimori, that dimwitted asshole, is not considerate at all to help with Gen's complicated feeling and condition. _Damn his obliviousness!_ Yoshimori keeps approaching Gen and making the sharp-eyed guy more miserable. He will do things that stir Gen's heart. They are considerably insignificant and nothing more than friendly gestures, but it almost rises the other boy to heaven whenever Yoshimori smiles at him and touches him. Okay, 'touch' is exaggerating; he merely brushes him on his hand or pats him on his shoulder, sometimes leans his back against Gen’s when they are fighting together back to back.

And each time it happens, Gen realizes that it is very improper to imagine such… such _t_ _h_ _ing_ _s_ and keeps berating himself inwardly to knock it off already. He is afraid that his feeling will turn into obsession that will end up with him being hated by the other boy. Yoshimori has admitted that he deems Gen as a friend and he needs him as one, no more, no less. If he finds out about Gen’s feeling, Yoshimori will be disgusted and will definitely scorn him.

Gen doesn’t want to lose the bond that's finally formed between them. Anyway, Yoshimori likes that Yukimura girl, so it is hopeless to begin with. He ponders why his feeling doesn’t go for Yukimura instead of Yoshimori. Is there any difference in how they treat Gen? Normally, a guy will be attracted to a girl, right? So why the hell is he more attracted to Yoshimori rather than Yukimura? It doesn’t make any sense at all.

Though, it’s futile even though he tries to think a reasonable explanation for his weird emotion. He hates not understanding things, but yeah… He still doesn’t know the answers. It is too complicated; his head can’t come up with any good excuse. He likes Yoshimori as more than a friend, so what? Anyway, he only has to hide it. Gen is trained to be emotionless, so he is confident that his lack of expression will help him conceal his feeling just fine.

As it may be…if you see your crush hitting on another girl in front of your eyes _every damned day_ , of course at some point you will feel jealous. Gen tries; heaven knows he does. But it is still too much for him. So… he begins to withdraw bit by bit from Yoshimori, putting a wall so as to spare his own heart from the blow of suffering his one-sided feeling causes, and Yoshimori, _curse him_ , seems aware of his change of attitude at some degrees.

It gets worse very fast after that because that suspicious _ayakashi_ , Kaguro, suddenly appears before Gen and offers him to join him or more like…to turn Gen into full _ayakashi_. He even gives him a strange egg that somehow knows whatever it is inside his heart and his head. It starts taunting him with his recent weakness: _Yoshimori_.

Horrible images of Gen turning into a beast someday that will hurt Yoshimori and Yukimura are agonizing. And yet, he can’t just throw away the nightmarish egg because it is the only thing that knows about his feeling for Yoshimori; the ultimate evidence that he is indeed conscious and is not imagining things. His mind becomes unstable, erratic, and he feels so furious. He is disgusted with himself because he has such weakness, such fear, and he can’t tell anybody else because he has _nobody_ to tell. Of course he can’t exactly bring up a subject as sensitive as that to both Yoshimori and Yukimura. It is too shameful even for himself.

Then…because of the repressed stress and unreleased frustration which are becoming more and more unbearable, he snaps in front of Yoshimori just because the boy won’t stop pestering him, asking whether he is alright or not, most likely because Gen is pissed off about everything these days. Gen almost slashes him with his own claws, just like that day…when he clawed his sister. It sickens and shocks Gen very much because he is still capable of using his power which he has sworn to use only to protect people, to hurt the most important person in his life. He is immediately convinced that he is indeed a monster that causes nothing but calamity and misfortune to the people he loved.

Of course, Yoshimori isn’t really hurt, apparently just surprised and thinks that he has made Gen angry again. He even apologizes first, but it causes Gen to fall into the worst self-loathing he has ever had. It isn’t Yoshimori's fault, but Gen has snapped at him and almost hurt him. Gen is the one wounded most by his own animalistic behavior. He feels that if he stays beside Yoshimori any longer, he will definitely hurt him later.

Thus…when Kokuborou decides to attack Karasumori fully that night, when an _ayakashi_ called Gagin comes down from the sky to eliminate the _kekkaishis_ , Gen stands between him and Yoshimori and Yukimura to protect his team. He fights as hard as he could, using all of his strength to the extent of getting Karasumori blessing to draw out his full _ayakashi_ power while still maintaining his _human_ side.

Then, when Kaguro slashes Gen’s chest with his _katana_ and his world slowly turns into darkness after he falls, Gen is glad. He doesn’t feel any pain at all. He is satisfied that he can die protecting the one he loves, the one he cherishes most in this world.

_Yoshimori…I am glad…_ _that_ _I was able to meet you…._

When he thinks he wants to die and Karasumori begins to assist his will, a hand grabs his own. Faint distressed voice cries out his name. In the midst of losing his consciousness and his life, he can see Yoshimori shouting his name worriedly over and over, and something… like beads of water starts dripping, drop by drop, on to his face.

_Is it raining?_

Gen can’t help but reflect absently as he tries to focus his sight. It isn’t the rain, though. It’s…Yoshimori's tears. He is sobbing while yelling out his name. Crying…looking so upset and distraught; and he’s saying something…something…

"Don't you dare die on me, Shishio Gen! I need you here, you bastard! Don't die!" He is practically screaming desperately; clutching Gen's hand so hard it’s painful. "Did you hear me!? Come back to me, Shishio! I need you!"

_He needs me? I…the filthy_ _a_ _yakashi_ _m_ _ajiri who almost killed his own sister and almost hurt him with his claws…. Does he really…?_

" _You love him don't you?"_ —part of Gen's mind whispers to him from the back of his head.

_Yes…I love him…more than anyone else…_

" _Then…how could you make him cry like that?"_ —Wait, it can’t be Gen's mind speaking. It’s…what? _Who_? Gen doesn’t really understand, but the voice is calming and soothing; it feels really comfortable listening to it.

_Cry…?_

" _You will_ _upset_ _him even more if you die right now, leaving him behind like that."_

_He will be…_ _sad_ _?_

" _Would you still wish to die knowing your death will_ _hurt_ _him most?"_

"Shishio!" Gen can still hear Yoshimori's fearful cry, calling for him. He can see Yoshimori’s tearful eyes and face and feel his shaky hands… Yoshimori’s expression…it’s so heart-wrenching such that he almost cries himself.

_Don't cry…. I don't wish…to make_ _you_ _cry…._

" _Your wish then…?"_

_I…want to see_ _Yoshimori_ _smile…. I want him…to smile…always…always…._

When Gen finally closes his eyes losing his consciousness completely, he indistinctly hears the soft voice answer, _"Your wish…is granted."_

The next thing Gen knows, all his pain is gone; and when he opens his eyes, he is on a _futon_ beneath a warm blanket under a wooden ceiling, with Yoshimori sleeping beside him, his hand still holding Gen’s loosely.

"What…?" Gen can’t really grasp the situation. He thought he had died. With his free hand, he tries to pinch his own cheek, to check whether he is dreaming or something. Still, the action hurts, so he can safely assume that he is still pretty much alive and isn’t actually dreaming or hallucinating.

Gen glances beside him at the sleeping Yoshimori. He is sound asleep, looking very innocent and content. _Does_ _he find my company comfortable for him?_ —Unconsciously, Gen's hand reaches out Yoshimori's hair that covers his forehead and strokes it lightly, moving a few strands of hair to get a better look on Yoshimori’s face. There are still visible tears-streaks on his cheeks. He must have tired himself out crying. He looks just like a child like this.

Gen closes his eyes and leans more closely _into_ Yoshimori's head. "Forgive me, for making you cry…" he whispers lightly and promptly plants a feather light kiss on Yoshimori's forehead.

"Nnh…" Yoshimori moans a little in response, and he tosses his hand slightly aside only to find Shisio's arm and then hugs it tightly while forming a small relieved smile on his face.

Gen can’t help blushing at that. _No, no, no!_ Scratch that! He is Shishio Gen and he doesn’t blush! Oh well…Yoshimori looks so adorable then, such that he can’t really make a right expression in response. Okay, maybe it is close to a blush but… _Damn him for being this CUTE!_ —Gen can’t help feeling sorry for himself, falling more and more for this little devil's trap.

Yeah, Yoshimori cares about Gen, and he remembers how the other boy had said it repeatedly, again and again, that he needed Gen before the _ayakashi majiri_ passed out. Yoshimori needs him and he doesn’t let go off Gen’s hand whatever happens. He is…still holding on to him even now. He cares a lot…even though it is not _love_ , not the kind of affection that Gen hopes from him, _well_ , that’s alright. It’s nice enough. He can bear with it; can survive with it. As long as Yoshimori smiles at him, as long as he needs him, Gen can live _for_ that.

"As long as you're beside me and I can be by your side… I feel…whole." Gen closes his eyes once again. He still feels tired and a little bit sleepy. Maybe he can take a longer nap today before tomorrow comes, and then…

And then… Yoshimori will still be there when Gen wakes up, say 'good morning' to him and smile at him again with his lovely, cheery expression.

**~Fin~**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Eheheh, now I tried to make Kekkaishi fanfic. I know it's probably lame, but I really want to make one. It's supposed to be one shoot, but let me know if you want me to make it into series. I still have some ideas to put in this story, but because the theme would be different, it will be better to make it into separate chapters. Anyway, if you read it and find it worthy, please comment, ne? Criticism and suggestion are welcome, but don't flame please? Anyway, thanks for reading beforehand. See you at next story or at next project.


	2. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _After the last fight against Kaguro and Gagin, something strange happens to Gen's body. Everyone, especially Yoshimori thinks this is a good thing, but how does Gen feel about this change?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My hands are very itching to write more about Gen and Yoshi~ XDDD. Well, call this a sequel of 'If Things Run Differently' or call this the next chapter of the story or whatever you want. I'll give this the same title as the previous with different theme. Last time I made it 'smile'…and now let's take 'comfort' as a theme ^_^
> 
> **Disclaimer: Kekkaishi © Tanabe Yellow.**  
>  **Warning:** _semi AU, possible of oOC-ness, sap, fluff, shounen ai XD_

**If Things Run Differently**

**© lunaryu~**

**_Comfort_ **

* * *

It’s a few weeks later after the incident of that night, when Shishio Gen almost died protecting Karasumori from Kokuborou; or in this case protecting Yoshimori and Yukimura from Gagin and Kaguro. Of course, Yoshimori has defeated both of the monsters; and Karasumori has somehow rejected their leader to become its master. Masamori, his leader at Yagyou, as well as Yoshimori's older brother, tells Gen this story when Gen is still bedridden.

There is also _the_ time when Yoshimori talks to Gen after he is able to wake up and sit. "You know, you'd probably be angry if I say this after everything you'd been through," Yoshimori says as he scratches his cheek.

Gen only raises one of his eyebrows at him. "What is it?"

"I…at that time when you almost died…I was glad that you _are_ an _ayakashi majiri_ ," Yoshimori mutters, looking at anywhere but Gen. Gen is silent, thinking, and waits for the other boy to elaborate. "Otherwise…you would seriously die back then," Yoshimori continues eventually since Gen doesn’t retort back. "I was glad…that you were born as _ayakashi majiri_ , otherwise…we would never meet at all; you wouldn’t… stay beside me right now." He closes his eyes, his left hand reaches at Gen's dark-blue yukata collar and his forehead rests on Gen’s left shoulder.

Gen is admittedly rather shocked as the other boy shows him a vulnerable form like that, especially in front of him after all the superior act Yoshimori usually puts on in daily basis. Gen is so stunned that he can't even react properly. Of course, he can't exactly see Yoshimori's expression because it’s hidden behind his long bangs. Besides, the angle is impossible for Gen to see through his dark hair, but he can definitely tell when he feels the slightly shaky hand clenching on his yukata and the trembling shoulders beside him.

_Angry?_ — _Is he serious?_ Instead of feeling angry over that, Gen is…overwhelmed by a feeling he can't name anything but _excitement_. He doesn't know what happens exactly, but his heart thumps really fast and he can't control his expression well. The corner of his mouth twitches, he wants to smile so badly that it is painful to maintain his composure. In the end, he smiles…no. He _grins_ happily at that. Though, Yoshimori can't see his look either, so it is fine.

"Don't you dare…do something like that again, Shishio…!" Yoshimori grouches, still hiding his face, as Gen hesitantly puts his left hand on Yoshimori's head. Then, seeing that Yoshimori doesn’t flinch away, he ruffles his hair gently. "If you dare dying in front of me ever again, I won't forgive you this easily." Yoshimori huffs and Gen decides it’s alright for him to widen his grin like an idiot, imagining the _Kekkaishi_ boy pouting while blushing under that bangs.

For the first time in his life, Gen thanks God that he is an _ayakashi majiri_ because he has been given an opportunity to take Yoshimori's attention fully for himself.

Yoshimori raises his face and sends Gen his expectant stare, as if he were demanding some kind of answer for his earlier request ( _or was that an order?_ ). Gen quickly fixes his expression before Yoshimori can catch his idiotic grin. He closes his eyes and smiles faintly at him, trying to reassure Yoshimori that he will never do that again. Gen is truly happy when a relieved smile blooms on Yoshimori's face, indicating that he receives the silent message wholly.

Of course, Yoshimori can’t stay beside Gen all the time. He has school and _Kekkaishi_ duties, a _land_ to protect. Well, even though he still has time to visit Gen now and then between his activities. Usually Yoshimori comes after school or when he is about to go to Karasumori land at night. Sometimes he also comes with Yukimura girl, but she doesn't visit Gen as often as Yoshimori does.

Occasionally, Yoshimori will just sit there besides the futon while doing his homework or sharing some notes to Gen who’s not able to go to school yet in his recuperation period. At times he will just drop by and sleep the entire afternoon away peacefully in Gen's presence. Gen is treated in one of Yagyou's members' houses. It is still in Karasumori of course, but it is quite remote and far from the main land, so Gen finds it a bit strange that Yoshimori comes almost every day only to see how he is doing.

As strange as it may sound, Gen becomes so accustomed to Yoshimori's presence now that it’s almost scary. He feels extremely weird if the young _Kekkaishi_ isn’t around. Moreover, one thing comes to Gen's mind and bothers him to some extent when Gen examines his own body. Somehow, it feels rather… weird. His body feels heavy, much heavier than usual, and the pain from the damage he sustains in the last battle hasn’t healed as much as usual either. It _is_ getting better, but… it’s also still very _raw_.

After all, it’s not the first time Gen gets a near-death experience, so he quite knows it takes time to heal so many wounds, but… isn’t it too slow? It’s been more than a week, and yet he’s still bedridden. Something is definitely wrong with his body. He can feel it. It’s as if… his fast regeneration ability stopped working. Besides, he’s not used to being unable to move for too long after a battle. Wounds like those…they should have healed in three days, a week to if it’s quite lethal, but now…. It just feels alien to Gen that he can’t help wondering.

Then, when finally he’s able to move again and begin to review his training, his muscles protest so much to the point of excruciating. The rehabilitation is done under Atora's guiding, but he still can't move as fast as before. Atora also finds this very odd. Thus when the time comes for him to do an actual combat training, Shishio Gen can't activate his _ayakashi_ power. In result, he is thrown by Atora's pet quite hard and is sent flying six meters behind until his back slammed against a tree bark with a loud crack.

"Gen!" Atora shouts and runs to him worriedly as he tries to stand up in difficulty. It is devastatingly hard for him to move again. "Gen, are you alright?" Atora kneels beside him, trying to help him.

"I can't…activate my power," Gen groans while looking at his clenched and unclenched hands in confusion.

_What the hell happened to my body!?_

* * *

**_~_ ** **Gen x Yoshimori~**

* * *

When Masamori comes to check on him, he informs Gen something very shocking. "It seems that…Gen has lost his _ayakashi_ side," he speaks slowly and calmly, but in a serious tone.

"Is that even possible?" Yoshimori who happens to be there seems quite surprised. Atora and Yukimura also widen their eyes at that, taken aback, but the one who is shocked most by this news is…Shishio Gen himself.

"I don't know for sure. It's the first case ever happening where _ayakashi_ _majiri_ loses his _ayakashi_. Usually, if the ayakashi dies, the person will also die since they share the same soul, but this…will actually explain why Gen suddenly loses his power," Masamori explains.

"Can't it be just dormant after the near-death experience?" Yukimura voices her opinion.

"That is another possibility," Masamori puts his fingers on his chin, thinking silently before he makes eye contact with Gen. "How are you feeling, Gen?" he asks softly after that.

"I don't… know. It just feels weird. My muscles become so stiff it's hard to move like I used to do. My speed also decreases significantly and…I just can't bring out my claws," Gen frowns as he repeats his clenching-unclenching motion to feel his hands better. Still nothing.

"Most importantly, when you get hurt…?" Masamori trails off.

"Yes, the wounds don’t regenerate as fast as they should be. It takes much longer time to heal than it used to," Gen fills in, looking at Masamori, slightly miffed.

"Then it’s highly possible that it’s not just dormant," Atora furrows her brow at that. "In an _ayakashi majiri_ dormant power case, it doesn't decrease the ability to regenerate fast," she says, adding the information. "Impossible…could it be really-…"

"Isn't that great?" suddenly Yoshimori pipes up while grinning widely, stealing everyone's attention in the room. Gen is a bit shocked when he hears that. Everyone seems bemused, but Yoshimori's grin just widens. "That way, Shishio, you can become a normal boy and stay with your family again, right? I bet your family will be really glad and excited to take you back!" he quips really cheerfully.

Yoshimori's cheery grin and mood are contagious somehow, because everyone in the room starts chuckling at how positive Yoshimori can be. Even Masamori barks out a small laugh. He ruffles Yoshimori's hair while saying "You're right," with a pleased grin as well.

Yoshimori starts complaining after that, that his brother messes up his already messed up hair and pouts at him childishly. Masamori just laughs at him and messes his hair even more despite the younger's struggle. Atora and Yukimura giggle at them. Somehow…Gen is the only one who feels a bit complicated about this situation.

No, no, he doesn’t feel unhappy about the prospect of meeting and staying with his family again, but…it seems that Yoshimori forgets one thing or he just feels that it’s insignificant enough for him to mention. If Gen becomes a normal boy…without any power whatsoever… he won't be able to stay at Karasumori anymore. Doesn’t that equal him having to leave Yoshimori's side as well? Doesn’t Yoshimori…feel _anything_ about that?

In the midst of the joyful state of affairs, Gen silently looks at his hands again. He feels rather lost. He’s supposed to hate his body as an _ayakashi majiri_. Then…why does it feel so hard to let it go? He must…prepare to leave his life he has been accustomed to. He must…get used to not being around Yoshimori anymore.

_Am I really okay with that?_

* * *

**~Gen x Yoshimori~**

* * *

When Gen is finally able to go back to school some days later, Yoshimori seems to notice that Gen stops talking with him and Yukimura; he is never there at the usual spot on the rooftop when Yoshimori usually takes a nap and isn’t in his class when Yoshimori looks for him. Even though Gen still watches over Yoshimori at some point, he feels awkward to greet him and speak to him like he used to. Well, not that gen sought Yoshimori’s company actively before, but he makes an effort to actually hide his presence from the other boy now. Gen kind of realizes that they aren’t in the same boat anymore. A world where Yoshimori lives now is completely different from his own; a world that once Gen knew, but no longer since he lost his power.

At one afternoon then, somehow Yoshimori apparently has had enough of Gen’s silent treatment, and confronts him. "What the hell is your problem, Shishio!? How could you ignore me and Tokine when we need you!?" Yoshimori points his index finger at him in accusation while growling, looking very pissed off.

Gen can only blink once and then stares at him for a second before he looks the other way, seeming to irritate Yoshimori even more. "Don't look away from me, damn it! I am talking to you, Shishio Gen!" and he increases in voice level as he yells in frustration.

"I don't have…anything to do with you anymore," Gen mutters slowly, still refusing to face Yoshimori. Gen expects Yoshimori to immediately retort back, but when there is no reply from the other boy, the spiky haired boy can't help stealing a glance at Yoshimori. What he sees there is shocking him to the bone.

Yoshimori is…looking at him as if he were hurt. Well, he probably _is_ since he looks at Gen with such a painful expression. "I see," Yoshimori then sighs in resignation, closing his eyes. "After obtaining the normal life, you don't want to have anything to do with _ayakashi_ world anymore. I understand. I’m sorry for beothering you." Then he turns his back on Gen.

When Gen sees that Yoshimori is about to walk away from him… from their- their supposedly _developing_ -to-more-than-friendship, Gen can't help himself. His hand just moves on its own accord and reaches for Yoshimori's shoulder, grasping him to stop him. "You're the one who said I could go home and live normally!" Gen’s mouth also opens and his voice comes out against his will, his eyes boring into Yoshimori's dark orbs gravely, and somehow he feels an irrational anger burning inside him. He tightens his grip on Yoshimori’s shoulder to the point of almost painful even for his own hand.

"What…?" Yoshimori blinks at Gen's sudden outburst in confusion.

_Wait, what the hell I am saying!? Stop it, my mouth!_ —Gen's mind screams to shut his mouth, but at that time, his body just doesn't feel like obeying his brain.

"You're the one who said it was great that I could go home and leave everything behind to come back to that normal life!" Gen doesn’t understand why he is shouting at Yoshimori, why he is mad at the other boy when he has done nothing wrong. But he also can’t deny his feeling… he’s feeling hurt. His chest feels painful at the thought that he has to leave… has to distance himself from his only friend, a friend that he’s developing feelings for, a friend that is still willing to hold his hand even when Gen himself is disgusted with his own power and body.

_Are you saying…that you don't need me anymore…?_ —Gen grits his teeth and shuts his eyes.

"Shishio…" Yoshimori apparently realizes what’s going on inside Gen's head, because then he suddenly straigtens himself and slaps the back of Gen's head hard.

"OW! What the hell—!?" Gen almost protests at Yoshimori, but then he grabs Gen's hand and looks at him seriously, cutting whatever line the taller boy wants to yell at him.

_My presence means nothing to you but a burden now…!_

"Who says to leave everything behind?" Yoshimori demands an explanation then, his eyes drilling a figurative hole through Gen's onyx ones into his mind.

"Well, isn't that what you mean by living normally? You said it was great that my power was gone. Do you even consider what that means? I have to leave Karasumori and I won't be able to fight beside you guys anymore. Isn't that the same as telling me to leave you alone? Without my power…I can't even protect myself, let alone protect anything else. I will just drag your feet down and I-…!

_I can't stay by your side anymore…!_

"I've lost my right…to be your friend…!" Gen blurts out everything in his chest, still grtting his teeth and shutting his eyes painfully, and slowly he pries his hand off Yoshimori's. He feels pathetic for being so miserable about all of this he almost cries. Oh God, tell him it’s not true! How could Shishio Gen almost cry over something so stupid like this!? What the hell is wrong with him anyway!?

"Are you a moron?" Then, comes Yoshimori's weird response, it ticks Gen very much. He actually wants to shout at the boy, but then he is caught off guard when Yoshimori began to chuckle and laugh.

"What's so damn funny?" Gen can't help snapping at him.

"Oh, God, I can't believe this. Shishio, you think too much!" Yoshimori then laughs harder and slaps Gen's back hard. "How come you conclude something as depressing as that? I only said it was great you could reunite with your family again. And the _normal life_ thing I said back then means you can finally join the social life without fearing that someday you will hurt anyone with your power! You can make many friends this way, not losing right to become a friend! By the way, who says you will drag our feet down? We still need your _ninja_ skill to gain information! Besides, who tells you to leave us alone? Your presence has become so familiar for me it feels weird when you're not around. Anyway, I haven't paid back my debt for being rescued by you several times, so I will take the advantage to protect you from now on!" Yoshimori grins widely at that, looking really in high spirits.

Gen can only widen his eyes in surprise. That is…Yoshimori's thought when he said that. It is filled with Gen's hope when he was still a kid. A normal life…with many friends….

"And Shishio," now Yoshimori has calmed down a bit from his laughter and stares at Shishio's eyes surely in gentle look. "Your presence here… has always given me strength to fight, whether you have _ayakashi_ power or not, it doesn't matter. By realizing that you're here, alive well, staying by my side…I feel happy and relieved. That's why… don't go anywhere. Stay beside me." Yoshimori then takes Shishio's hand once again and holds it tightly. "No matter how many times, I’ll repeat it over and over again. I will never let go of your hand and you too, please don't let go off my hand that easily, okay?" he smiles completely determined and full of faith.

Gen can only look at their hands, entwined strongly, and then slowly, to Sumimura Yoshimori's face. Moments later…a smile, a genuine one, emerges from Gen's stoical expression. "It's a promise then," he replies softly as he resolutely looks back at Yoshimori's eyes.

Yoshimori returns his smile happily and adorably, causing Gen to almost blush and he has to avert his gaze to avoid humiliating himself in front of his crush. But apparently, he isn’t successful enough because Yoshimori’s smile turns into a smirk at the way his face must have reddened since he proceeds to tease gen about it with total amusement, much to Gen’s righteous indignation.

A day later though, Yoshimori can find Gen on his usual napping spot and he grins at Gen who just scowls at him to scram if he is about to bother him with unnecessary babbling. Still then, after Yoshimori forces Gen to sit down and to hear his useless chatter, mostly his whining of how cold Yukimura is to him, Yoshimori ends up resting his back against Gen's warm one, both were facing a vast-vast blue sky without clouds.

"Hey, it's heavy, move it," Gen complains while frowning. Somehow, these days he doesn't have any personal space anymore as Yoshimori keeps on intruding and tailing him everywhere.

"Nope, I am comfortable like this," Yoshimori said, grinning, not that Gen can see his stupid face, but he surely can hear it in Yoshimori’s tone and imagine how it looks.

"Are you really that comfortable around me?" Gen asks then, a question he has wanted to ask for awhile now.

"Yep!" Yoshimori chirps positively.

"To tell you the truth, I am not really comfortable with it," Gen mumbles quietly then, earning him a confused 'huh?' from Yoshimori. "Being close to you does strange things to my head, I almost can't control it," he confesses, purposely being vague due to the fear of rejection. His face is a bit warm, but Yoshimori can't possibly see him with their back-to-back positions.

Yoshimori doesn't say anything to that. Gen's heart is pounding so hard and fast in suspense he almost can feel that it’s about to burst out his ribcage. He wonders if Yoshimori can feel the erratic thumping through his back. In the end though, Yoshimori still doesn't reply with his words, but then Gen notices him moving his hand, but not when it reaches at Gen's.

Gen is honestly startled at first when he feels it, but then he can only smile slightly when Yoshimori's fingers slipping between his own, entwining themselves gently with Gen’s. Yoshimori’s palm and fingers felt rough, full of scars courtesy of his intense training and work as _Kekkaishi_ , but they are warm and very comforting. It’s as if they were telling Gen that Yoshimori will always be there for him no matter what.

Gen's heartbeat slows down and becomes steady after a few moments of silence. Yoshimori doesn't say anything indeed, but he doesn't reject his confession as well.

Yoshimori is still comfortable beside him. Gen concludes silently.

Gen’s smile widens a fraction before he closes his eyes. For the time being, he will also try to be comfortable around Yoshimori. He _can_ make himself feel comfortable like this, beside Yoshimori, warm and content.

**~Fin~**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: It's sappy, too sappy! T_T I am sorry for making Gen rather oOC here. It's just the real Gen is too emotionless, but I do feel he would have felt insecure if he had been in that position. Well, aside for the stupid fluff and sap, hope this fic is also okay. Comments are always welcome ^_^


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